


little things

by louiscentric



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-17
Updated: 2013-08-17
Packaged: 2017-12-23 20:18:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/930702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/louiscentric/pseuds/louiscentric
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the one where louis is really insecure and harry wants louis to know that he's beautiful - inside and out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	little things

louis lets the cool blade run across his wrist slowly, soaking all the pain up. watching the blood run down his arm onto his bedroom floor. tears run down his face but he doesn't seem to care, he hasn't cared in a long time. right now all he's focused on is the pain stinging his wrist. he wishes he didn't have to hide anymore. he wishes that him and harry could run away together and not worry about management, fans, and his career. when he comes to think about it, he wonders why harry is still with him and why he hasn't left him yet. harry could get anyone he wanted, but he chose louis.

_he deserves better._

_better than him._

louis gets up from the floor of his bedroom and he walks to the bathroom. the cold floor beneath his feet makes him shiver vigorously. he switches the light on and looks at his reflection in the bathroom mirror and grimaces. he feels disgusting and worthless. he hates the way his smile gives him crow's feet. he hates the way his stomach pokes out. he hates the way he looks so feminine. louis turns on the faucet and rinses off his cuts. the cooling water burns on his skin and he winces. he hears the front door open and close, as he hears harry's voice fill the silence of their shared flat.

"boo, i'm home."

louis eyes widened slightly and he turns off the faucet. he looks through his cabinets trying to find something to cover up his fresh scars.

"boo, where are you?"

he hears harry's soothing voice booming as he enters their bedroom. louis can't find anything to cover up and he's flipping out. harry notices the bathroom light is on and he walks to the door, twisting the door knob. it's locked. louis didn't even notice he locked the door, but he's glad he did. he releases a shaky breath and watches the door knob twisting and turning as harry fumbles with the door.

"babe, open up," harry shouts through the thick wood between them, "i've got us bagels."

"i-i'm not h-hungry." his voice is shaky, and he sounds so vulnerable and helpless. he hates it.

"are you okay, boo?" harry's voice goes completely serious.

"i'm fine harry. can you leave me alone now?" he weakly snaps and he's really trying to contain his breathing and nervous stutters. he leans his back against the counter and he looks at harry's feet peaking through the bottom of the door.

"unlock the door," harry's voice is firm, but at the same time, unbalanced. 

"no."

"unlock the door, louis." his voice raising slightly.

"no harry." louis can feel tears brimming through his eyes, he closes them trying to ignore the burning feeling of the tears threatening to fall.

"please," his voice pleading and he almost sounds as vulnerable as louis - that's the breaking point. his tears fall and his breathing quickened. his tears are streaming and he lets out a few quiet sobs before speaking again.

"i-i can't, you're going to be," louis stops mid sentence, another choked sob filled the air, "disappointed and d-disgusted."

"no, no, baby. i love you. open the door. _please._ "

louis straightens up from the position he was in and envelops his small hand around the door knob. he doesn't want harry to see him like this, but he can hear harry's voice pleading and he gives in. he unlocks the door and opens it slightly before going back to his previous position, he hides the abused arm behind his back. harry walks in and he studies louis' face. _sadness, lost, and guiltiness._  harry slowly walks over to louis and enrolls louis into a hug. louis put his face in harry's neck and breathes in his scent, which immediately calms him down a bit. he can feel the heat radiating off of his body and he cries even harder. harry coos in his ear and shushes his him as he whispers reassuring _love you's_. harry pulls back, but still has his arms wrapped tightly around him.

"what's wrong babe?"

"nothing love," he states with the most widest, yet fakest smile ever.

"louis."

"i-i can't. i'm s-sorry."

"listen, i love you. i will never judge you okay, you should know that by now. you mean the world to me, louis. i can't stand to see you so sad. please tell me, louis. please"

louis pulls his arm from behind his back and he shows it to harry. louis closes his eyes again so he won't have to see harry's disappointed face - he doesn't think he would be able to handle it. his tears are pushing against his eyelids once more.

"w-why louis?"

louis could tell he's about to cry too but he doesn't respond.

"why?"

louis slowly opens his eyes and looks in harry's eyes. he studies his face, watching every emotion that passes harry's face. _sadness, lost, guiltiness_.

"harry, i'm so sorry. I'm so sorr-," louis choked on a sob and continued, "i love you. please don't be mad at me. don't hate me i -"

"i love you, louis. i can never hate you. why can't you understand that? why can't you see yourself the way I see you?"

"i don't deserve you, harry. what do you see in me? i'm not funny, i'm not attractive, i'm not tall or muscular. why are you still with me?"

harry watches louis in complete disbelief before speaking, "do you really think that? louis, If anything, i don't deserve you. you're beautiful. so beautiful - look at me, louis - you don't have to be tall to be attractive. i'm going to make sure that you see how perfect you are to me."

at this point, louis has tears literally streaming down his face. he is so lucky to have someone like Harry. he can't believe it, to be honest.

"thank you harry. you're always flying to my rescue."

"you don't have to thank me. i'm not doing you a favor, i'm telling you the truth. go sit down on the bed."

louis complies and he moves past harry to make it to their bed.

harry sits across from louis so that their knees are touching. harry grabs both of louis' hands and intertwines them, kissing louis' knuckles softly.

"i'm going to tell you about this beautiful boy named louis, he's been my boyfriend for three years. he has a beautiful white smile that can brighten a room in seconds. he has these ocean blue eyes that crinkle whenever he smiles. he has small hands that fit perfectly in mine and he always tells me how safe he feels. he is 5'7 and he has to stand on his toes to kiss me, he thinks it's embarrassing but i think it's beautiful. he has dark brown hair, that he either pulls up in a quiff or he lets it lay on his face like as a fringe. he has adorably small ears and i always enjoy biting them. he has a cute button shaped nose and a delicious looking arse. i love every little thing about louis and i don't ever want him to change for anyone," harry pauses to kiss every scar on louis' wrist before continuing again, "you're perfect, lou. i don't want you to forget that. i love you so much that for the lifetime we spend together, i'm going to remind you every day. every single day. these scars you have represent the struggle you went through, and I was so oblivious to notice what was going on. i'm so sorry, louis. but i promise you, that for now on that i'll always be there for you. _always._ "

louis lets every word sink in and then pulls harry in for a kiss that is filled with his unspoken words of _thank you's_ and _i love you's_. they both close their eyes and savor the feeling of their lips touching because once they go in public, they would have to act distant towards each other.

the kiss goes on for a couple minutes before they break apart.

"you're perfect, harry."

"you're perfect, lou."

**Author's Note:**

> SORRY IF IT'S BAD - I WAS SLEEPY BUT I WANTED TO FINISH IT SO


End file.
